Monday, November 11, 2013

Humility

Momma,
Good morning my dear :)  Your email really brought so much comfort to my heart.  I loved what you said you are grateful for.  You have so many blessings and I am so grateful that you have the ability to see those blessings. This week was awesome!  I had some really amazing things happen this week.  First, I am glad you got my letter :) I wanted you to have a little taste of what I do every day.  And that is really how everyday goes!  I want to do that more, just write a little summary of my day for you.  I am grateful that I feel comfortable with sharing the hard times, because there are plenty.  But that I get to share the most joyful of moments with you, as well.  This transfer has been anything but easy.  This has been one of my hardest transfers!  I thought I did a lot of growing last transfer... and then felt I took a step back on this one. But...there were lessons that I learned that I know I will take for the rest of my life.  One of the biggest is how to be selfless.  You know how I am... I can be a selfish person ;-)  But I couldn't be this transfer.  I literally could not be, even if I wanted to.  I had something in my path that was much more important than me.  I have learned a lot in this companionship.  I hope that I am always able to put others before me.  As a missionary, I am here to invite others to Christ.  That doesn't just mean my investigators, it means members, missionaries, and companions.  I talked to President the other day and he thanked me for what I have done this transfer.  He told me that it was a lot harder than I had imagined and even that he imagined. He thought it was hard!  But he told me he was proud of the things that I had done.  So onto another transfer... not sure how the time went so fast.  I am about to start my 6th transfer!  And with that I will be training again!  What!? I didn't expect it either!  I will be staying here in Hollywood, training.  Obviously, I need to be super humbled or something. 
That's another thing I have learned immensly this transfer, humility.  I had never in my whole life relied on my Heavenly Father as much as I did this transfer!  I have see the blessings of turning it over to the Lord.  I wanted to share something that I saw yesterday in Relief Society. There was a Hermana who was going through a trial (I'm not exactly sure what happened).  So on Sunday, they presented her in RS and gave her a simple card and a bag of chocolates.  When she went up to get it, she just began to cry.  Over this gift that was sooo incredibly simple.  A gift that if someone had received it, they would have usually just said 'thank you' with a hug.  But this Hermana was so thankful.  She was so humble.  And it made me see that the small things are so incredibly important.  That we must see and recognize what others do for us, and how we can help others.  People are always in need, and always in much more need than us.  I love doing that as a missionary.  Seeing these people who are holding on so tight to what they have, and we get to give them this blessing that fills their lives with complete light.  I love my job.  The things that I have learned this transfer are countless.  I will never be able to explain them through a simple letter.  But I hope that you can see them and feel them.  I know that I am not the same Sister Warner that left the MTC!  It is amazing.

I thought about you a lot on Saturday, as it was Michael's birthday.  Time really doesn't seem to heal that.  But I had an amazing experience.  It was in the morning, and I had a minute to be alone.  I reminded myself that it was his birthday.  I felt something that I have never felt in my whole life.  My heart literally felt full.  I felt like he was hugging me and he was right by my side.  I wish I could explain this better, but it was amazing.  I knew that he was there with me.  And that he is with me preparing the hearts of these people.  He is so proud of each and every one of us!  I know that.

I got Bryan's beautiful wedding invite on Friday.  I will be honest and tell you I went in the bathroom and gave myself some time to just cry.  And I did for a while.  I'm so sad to miss this but know I am where I need to be...

Well my dear, I love this email.  I hope all is well in happyville :)  Thank you for your sweet prayers, I feel them so much!  I love the work.  More than ever.  I love seeing the sweet miracles every day.  I hope you get to see them as well in your life.  I love you so much momma! Love, Michelle

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